Hey losers, long time lurker here.
I created this because I'm really fucking lost. I've been emotionally stuck for 10 years, I worked hardcore the last 4 years to get unstuck but I'm still in the same position and my alternatives and ideas are diminishing.
I'm going to give you a list of things I done, tried... and how I'm feeling. Sorry for the long thread, I REALLY need your help guys.
- I'm a 24 year old guy
- Virgin
- Can't talk to girls I don't know, unless they are part of the social circle or hobby, but even so it's still very hard for me.
- I work freelance but it's getting harder to concentrate, during the last 3-4 years my productivity has fallen to the point I procrastinate the projects until the last moment... I just can't work, I can't focus, I feel so miserably that it's almost impossible for me to work. If I don't work I don't eat...
- Still living with my mom, and being a loner, miserable, not necessarily depressed guy makes forming relationships with anybody even harder, I can't stand my mom but it's not her fault, I'm just super miserable.
- I hate wallowing in self-pity, this is not a thread of "oh poor me and my problems"... it's just that I don't know what the fuck else to do.
- I tried doing the AA program, I've been doing it on-off for 2+ years but I can't finish it. I get stuck on the 1-2 weeks. My anxiety and low self-steem ends up blocking me and I can't get any further. I feel pathetic.
- I tried online dating, went out with a couple girls and kissed one. Only managed to get first dates, never second dates.
Now I can't even use it, the other day I created accounts on tinder but I started feeling like shit. I always felt bad using those applications, it's like something is wrong... these things are so cold. I really tried, believe me, but after a month of using online dating I just end up feeling worse and more miserable.
- I became aware of my AA at 14 years old, and since then it has been limiting my life in every way possible, my relationships, my career... my entire life.
- I tried salsa dancing, acting, you name it... I talked to some girls there but I always end up leaving because I start to feel like shit, it's not necesarily anxiety, I start to get miserable because everyone around me is getting laid and being social and I'm here asking "WTF is wrong with me".
- I cannot make friends anymore, I tried, I have no problem talking to people but as week passes I lost interest and get miserable again because they have normal dating lives and I don't and that kills my self-steem and the current relationship. I feel like they are waaaay above me.
- I feel like most of the people my age are WAY ABOVE me in terms of dating, life experiences. At my 24 years old the ONLY thing I managed to improve is my work situation, but not that much. I could be earning a lot of money but again, my emotional issues get in the way and every day is worse.
- I don't have social anxiety, I don't have any problems chatting up with people. I just have problems with bonding because I feel like a fucking pathetic loser that hasn't managed to improve is love life yet.
- I was skinny until a couple months and I managed to gain a couple lbs and I look better.
- I know I'm attractive, I have chicks eyeing me everyday. I dress sharp too. So looks aren't the problem OBVIOUSLY.
- I really don't know what else to try, I can't stand trying another acting or salsa class because I just cannot stand being with people that have normal sex lives and are 100x better than me.
- I already tried the "first fix your mindset and be happy" route but it didn't work, it was like a temporal quick fix.
- I readed gorilla mindset and every manosphere respected blog (B&D, D&P, GLL), I tried everything, nothing REALLY worked, I'm still in the same situation.
- Being a virgin is not the problem, the problem is losing ALL the potential opportunities that I lost and they are VERY HEAVY weight on my soul and life.
- What should I do? I'm willing to put my last ounces of effort into solving this but I really don't know where should I look... I thought about volunteering but again, just being near people that are better and have more sex than me is enough to make me totally miserable and I end up leaving whatever activity I'm doing
- I look at porn but I don't like it (3-4 times a week), it makes me feel empty, I use it to don't feel that lonely at night, even though it doesn't make any difference. I tried the NO PMO thing but haven't experienced any differences from it.
- I tried counceling various times for a long time each one (1 year each), I improved but very very slightly and it wasn't enough to make a substantial difference
- I feel like I'm endlessly spinning my wheels, getting nowhere...
Is there any way to solve this? I thought various times about just killing myself and end this agony but I'm too much of a coward to doing it.
I created this because I'm really fucking lost. I've been emotionally stuck for 10 years, I worked hardcore the last 4 years to get unstuck but I'm still in the same position and my alternatives and ideas are diminishing.
I'm going to give you a list of things I done, tried... and how I'm feeling. Sorry for the long thread, I REALLY need your help guys.
- I'm a 24 year old guy
- Virgin
- Can't talk to girls I don't know, unless they are part of the social circle or hobby, but even so it's still very hard for me.
- I work freelance but it's getting harder to concentrate, during the last 3-4 years my productivity has fallen to the point I procrastinate the projects until the last moment... I just can't work, I can't focus, I feel so miserably that it's almost impossible for me to work. If I don't work I don't eat...
- Still living with my mom, and being a loner, miserable, not necessarily depressed guy makes forming relationships with anybody even harder, I can't stand my mom but it's not her fault, I'm just super miserable.
- I hate wallowing in self-pity, this is not a thread of "oh poor me and my problems"... it's just that I don't know what the fuck else to do.
- I tried doing the AA program, I've been doing it on-off for 2+ years but I can't finish it. I get stuck on the 1-2 weeks. My anxiety and low self-steem ends up blocking me and I can't get any further. I feel pathetic.
- I tried online dating, went out with a couple girls and kissed one. Only managed to get first dates, never second dates.
Now I can't even use it, the other day I created accounts on tinder but I started feeling like shit. I always felt bad using those applications, it's like something is wrong... these things are so cold. I really tried, believe me, but after a month of using online dating I just end up feeling worse and more miserable.
- I became aware of my AA at 14 years old, and since then it has been limiting my life in every way possible, my relationships, my career... my entire life.
- I tried salsa dancing, acting, you name it... I talked to some girls there but I always end up leaving because I start to feel like shit, it's not necesarily anxiety, I start to get miserable because everyone around me is getting laid and being social and I'm here asking "WTF is wrong with me".
- I cannot make friends anymore, I tried, I have no problem talking to people but as week passes I lost interest and get miserable again because they have normal dating lives and I don't and that kills my self-steem and the current relationship. I feel like they are waaaay above me.
- I feel like most of the people my age are WAY ABOVE me in terms of dating, life experiences. At my 24 years old the ONLY thing I managed to improve is my work situation, but not that much. I could be earning a lot of money but again, my emotional issues get in the way and every day is worse.
- I don't have social anxiety, I don't have any problems chatting up with people. I just have problems with bonding because I feel like a fucking pathetic loser that hasn't managed to improve is love life yet.
- I was skinny until a couple months and I managed to gain a couple lbs and I look better.
- I know I'm attractive, I have chicks eyeing me everyday. I dress sharp too. So looks aren't the problem OBVIOUSLY.
- I really don't know what else to try, I can't stand trying another acting or salsa class because I just cannot stand being with people that have normal sex lives and are 100x better than me.
- I already tried the "first fix your mindset and be happy" route but it didn't work, it was like a temporal quick fix.
- I readed gorilla mindset and every manosphere respected blog (B&D, D&P, GLL), I tried everything, nothing REALLY worked, I'm still in the same situation.
- Being a virgin is not the problem, the problem is losing ALL the potential opportunities that I lost and they are VERY HEAVY weight on my soul and life.
- What should I do? I'm willing to put my last ounces of effort into solving this but I really don't know where should I look... I thought about volunteering but again, just being near people that are better and have more sex than me is enough to make me totally miserable and I end up leaving whatever activity I'm doing
- I look at porn but I don't like it (3-4 times a week), it makes me feel empty, I use it to don't feel that lonely at night, even though it doesn't make any difference. I tried the NO PMO thing but haven't experienced any differences from it.
- I tried counceling various times for a long time each one (1 year each), I improved but very very slightly and it wasn't enough to make a substantial difference
- I feel like I'm endlessly spinning my wheels, getting nowhere...
Is there any way to solve this? I thought various times about just killing myself and end this agony but I'm too much of a coward to doing it.